Unnamed

2,022 Resolutions for 2022

  1. I shall stop exaggerating
  2. I shall stop wearing track pants in public…
  3. …and start wearing pants on Zoom calls
  4. I shall stop telling my wife she is married to a sex God – just a God will do
  5. I shall feel the top of my head before asking if anyone has seen my glasses?
  6. I shall stop yelling at politicians on the nightly news. According to my daughters, they can’t hear me
  7. I shall stop swearing
  8. I shall stop using the word ‘shall’
  9. I shall …. oh shit!
  10. I will continue to be the debonair, dreamy looking bloke I have always been
  11. I will work on my humility
  12. I will be less cynical about one-off mental health days and yellow cupcakes
  13. I will no longer get my medication mixed up with my dog’s, thereby avoiding an irresistible urge to drag my bum along the carpet
  14. I resolve not to lie when my psychiatrist asks how much I drink
  15. I will avoid cliches like the plague
  16. I will be more accepting of Bill Gates’ behaviour. Say what you like, but at least he isn’t wasting billions building rockets.
  17. I resolve to stop reading the obituaries to see if my name is in there
  18. I shall actually look through the fancy-looking books that have been ornamenting my coffee table for years
  19. I resolve to use my super powers of invisibility for good, not change rooms
  20. I resolve to be more politically correct but only if some others agree to be a little less
  21. I resolve not to speak about my lack of grandchildren in front of my daughters
  22. I resolve to stop these silly shenanigans right here, right now. Have a great year

David Westgate is a:

  • Mental Health Ambassador for Assure Programs
  • Speaker for the Black Dog Institute
  • Master Mental Health First Aid trainer
  • and bipolar 1.

#newyearresolutions #assureprograms #blackdoginstitute

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